12 + 99 = 4

Or, Ambition + Temperature = Reality

I had grand plans to run home from work tonight, plans which were thwarted when, about 3 miles into my run, I realized that it was 99°F even along the waterfront, and that crossing the tourist-laden Brooklyn Bridge and running up fume-y Atlantic Avenue in that heat was really going to suck. So I cut my run short after 4 miles.

Fortunately I sweated enough to still feel hardcore.

Training update: I ran 10 miles last Saturday, a totally beautiful run starting and ending in Prospect Park, and across both the Manhattan and Brooklyn bridges. The weather that morning was perfect, and I felt great. Tuesday night I had another hill workout, which wasn't exactly *fun* but I (and my calves) survived.

Count to Four

Even if you've already seen this, watch it again. It's so happy-making.

Street Cred

Overheard in the men's room after tonight's Ani DiFranco concert:

"We made it, guys. We earned some major street cred." Pause. "Use it wisely."

Piperlime Is The New Zappos

I'm a longtime spender at Zappos.com, often ordering 4 or 5 pairs of shoes at once, sometimes with multiple sizes or colours of a particular style. Free shipping! Free returns! More often than not, Zappos upgrades your shipping so that you order one day and the next day you get that magical email: "You have a package - please pick it up at the front desk." I love being able to sort by style, colour, and even heel height. In short, I'm really fussy about shoes. Zappos has been there for me through many changes of season, during which I inevitably become anxious about such decisions as whether or not to show my toes at work (currently yes) and whether I should buy boots with a heel (undecided).

Enter Piperlime, at whose email I scoffed when I first received one a year or two ago. "Oh, that's cute," I thought smugly, "Gap is trying to compete with Zappos with a shoe site. It'll never work." But I didn't unsubscribe, and eventually this year they got me with an email about trendy summer gladiator shoes.

The truth is, no matter how picky I am about footwear, I'm no fashionista, and I'll take all the help I can get. It didn't hurt that I'm keen on sandals that are a) flat and b) cover much of my feet, so the gladiators are already up my alley. But to have some sort of fashion expert reviewing the shoes and giving me suggestions seemed like a good idea, and I ordered a few pairs. When the shoes arrived, Piperlime's packaging charmed me: The inside of the shipping box is printed with Piperlime's sweet limey logo, and the invoice comes tastefully tucked into a lime green envelope. To top it all off, each shoe box came wrapped in brown tissue paper secured with a green lime sticker. Sweet times!

I decided to keep only one of the three pairs, and the other two pairs have been languishing in their boxes for the past month or so, because I vaguely dreaded the process of going to the website to print out a return label (which I keep forgetting to do at work, where I have access to such essential items as a printer). Today I finally decided to at least package them up so I could print the label on Monday and I was delighted to discover a self-adhesive return label IN THE BOX! Zappos, take note.

Now that I have a cool pair of summer sandals, I'm almost looking forward to deciding whether to get mid-calf or knee-high boots this Fall.

O Canada

In honour of Canada Day, UFF proudly presents a brief installment of Canadianisms: The Expressions Edition.

Expression #1: Had the biscuit

Meaning: Is broken or no longer working (electronics), has gone bad (food), is dead/dying (plants, pets). I read somewhere that during wartime, the mattresses placed outside a first aid tent were called "biscuits," and when a soldier died he was placed on the mattress - hence he'd "had the biscuit." It's more commonly attributed to the host used in the Catholic sacrament for the dying.

Usage Example 1: "My watch stopped working again. I think it's had the biscuit."

Usage Example 2: "These cherries have had the biscuit. I'm going to throw them out."

Usage Example 3: "That hydrangea's had the biscuit. I guess that's what happens when you forget to water it."

Expression #2: Fucking the dog

Meaning: It's not what you think! To fuck the dog simply means to waste time. I don't know the origin because I'm old enough to know better than to Google "fucking the dog," but by all means knock yourself out (and don't blame me if you're forever scarred).

Usage Example: "My hard drive at work finally had the biscuit, so I fucked the dog all day."

Happy Canada Day!

The French Lifter

Tonight as I was making treats for tomorrow's festivities I was reminded of a conversation I had whilst in Waterloo back in April.

I was there for young Charlie's first birthday, and as I had been charged with baking his cake, I brought with me my usual cake-decorating implements, including my offset spatula:As our post-party hangovers were subsiding and I was packing up my belongings, I asked Dr. & Mr. Sirrah! if either of them had seen my offset spatula.

Sirrah!: No, I haven't seen it.

Greg (rooting through the drawers and holding up an offset spatula): Does this look like yours?

Me: I think that's mine, unless you guys have one like that.

Greg: I thought we did. Sirrah, do you know if this is our offset spatula?

Sirrah!: I thought that was a French lifter.

At that point, as it often does, the conversation deteriorated rapidly:

Me: Hey baby, let's try the French Lifter later.

Greg: I think I threw my back out performing the French Lifter last night.

Dog: Ooh, yeah, I love it when she does the French Lifter.

Sirrah! (rolling her eyes): I thought that's what it was called.

Back, then, to tonight, when just as Dog was leaving to meet his brother for a drink, he saw me holding the infamous utensil. "Ooh," he said, "had I known you were going to get out the French Lifter tonight, I wouldn't have made other plans."

Back to California

Strawberry Shortcake
Originally uploaded by Kitty LaRoux.

Last weekend I made the first of 2008's pilgrimages to California. We arrived at SFO to unusually warm weather, and after a stop for the most delicious burrito in the world, or at least North America we drove down Hwy 1 through Pacifica to Half Moon Bay. We stopped on Hwy 92 to buy strawberries, which were advertised at $6/box. We both thought it was sad that we could get California strawberries cheaper in NY right now until we learned that a box didn't mean what we thought it meant - it meant SIX of what we thought it meant! Six dollars garnered us a half-flat of sweet, ripe berries the size of small apples, which we couldn't even finish in our short stay (though not for lack of trying). Above: Possibly my most delicious birthday cake ever.

UFF Loves xkcd

And You May Ask Yourself

As you may have deduced from my most recent Flickr pics, I was in Canada last weekend to do some recruiting at my alma mater, visit my peeps in Waterloo, and run a 10k.

Dog & I flew back from Buffalo and when a handy email from Orbitz alerted us that our flight was delayed an hour we decided to detour through Niagara Falls. Yeah, we just decided to stop and see the Falls, like you might stop to get gas at a Shell station. Just like last year when I used to occasionally go for a run at lunchtime - across the Brooklyn Bridge. Oh and tonight after work, I'm going to swing over to a little venue around the corner from my office to see a band play - just the band that pretty much defined my high school musical experience.

Then tomorrow morning? Oh, you know, we're flying to San Francisco for a wedding and to celebrate someone's (ahem) 34th (dear god, how did I get so far past 30?) birthday (it's on Saturday, in case you're keeping track of these things - express shipping will still get my gift here on time, even!). And I was informed last night that I will need to take Monday off work and change my Sunday evening flight to Monday afternoon. Can do.

At the very least, two 5-hour flights mean plenty of time for writing, in particular for finishing the draft posts I've started in the midst of all this wonderfulness. Stay tuned.